Disappointed, misunderstood, dejected and a step away from throwing in the towel. That’s how one of my executive clients felt following the latest decisions announced at her company.
She was in total disagreement with these decisions and the criteria behind them. She was only able to see worst-case scenarios for her and the organization.
“They’re making a huge mistake!”…, she kept repeating.
They had decided for her… .
Over several sessions, her discourse only focused in this direction. She was clearly suffering.
Professional environments are shaped by decisions. As long as they align with our expectations, everything seems fine. Unfortunately, this is often not the case.
- What happens when we don’t like these decisions? What’s more, what happens when these decisions directly impact us?
In the situation that I’ve described, there was only one right answer: hers. And hers was different than the one communicated by her higher-ups. In these situations, the best tack is to find ways to take a step back, reach a consensus and work together to align expectations. Nonetheless, we should also recognize in the professional development of an executive in any organization, this door isn’t always open.
One thing is certain: as in this case, these situations make us feel bad…, and sometimes they make us feel really bad. We become stuck in a rut of constant complaint. We rightly feel like a victim. After falling into this dynamic, it becomes really hard to take action, much less reflect.
“What can I do about this?…” This is the first thing she asked herself when she broke away from her habit of complaining.
- Now it was her turn to decide.
In many cases, ACCEPTANCE is the first and most important step we can take to distance ourselves from whatever is causing us grief, anger and a complete mental block. Only after gaining some distance can we open ourselves up to a different reality and new sensations.
This is about acceptance, never conformity. It means accepting a situation to allow yourself to regain your ability to focus, reflect and act, as only you know how to do.
I was straightforward with her and asked a question that she took days to answer. If you’re going through a similar situation, here you have it:
Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?